They told me in full detail what this would feel like.
They described it to me and i told them
“No, this will never happen to me. I’m not that vulnerable”
But they didn’t prepare me for this.
Nothing could have prepared me for this. No exam, no quiz, no test.
This thing they described to me
They called it “falling in love”
and i told them
“I won’t fall in love, i’ll walk into it with my eyes wide open so i can be prepared for anything”
I laughed at my friends who had this disease.
How silly they acted.
And now, i can only laugh at myself.
I know it all now,
i feel it all,
It’s like falling so far for so long..
drifting through the clouds and then suddenly hitting the hard earth.
and everything stays intact.
everything but your heart.
That alone breaks into a million tiny, un-glueable pieces.
and it’s held together by this one person
if he let’s go, it’ll all fall apart.
so you keep him close.
you stay with him,
and he makes you happy,
so gloriously happy.
And you pray each night that he won’t let go
that he won’t get bored
or get distracted
because if he does,
if he opens his hand
and let’s your heart fall
you just might die..